Dating Myths Debunked
With Valentine’s Day just passed, I thought it was time we shed some light on some common dating myths. Ah, the dating game. It’s hard, confusing and can definitely seem overwhelming with all the ‘rules’ we are expected to follow. Let them ask you out, let them pay, don’t reply to their texts too quickly and definitely don’t discuss any serious feelings OR you’ll scare them off. When we begin to examine and break down these rules, they seem laughable. And sure, some dating ‘rules’ do hold merit, however, most just seem confusing! So we thought we would debunk some dating myths to try to make this whole dating thing a little less overwhelming.
Myth or Fact?
Myth: There must instantly be a spark or fiery chemistry.
Fact: Often people will go on dates expecting fireworks to appear to indicate they’ve found the one and have the spark. The reality of it all though is sometimes this doesn’t happen, but that doesn’t mean a slow burn couldn’t occur. Perhaps give them a second or third date to see if the chemistry is there.
Myth: Dating is serious business for finding the one.
Fact: There is so much pressure to date to find the one, find a husband, a wife, a life-long partner. But really dating can just be super fun, it can be about meeting new people and experiencing new things. Try not to get too caught up in the seriousness of it all and just enjoy getting to know someone new, who knows when you let go of expectations you may in fact find someone amazing.
Myth: Women can’t make the first move instead men have to ask you out first (in heterosexual relationships).
Fact: This one is a big fat myth and super rooted in stereotypical gender roles which state that men have to be the dominant ones taking charge. But don’t feel obliged to follow the gender narrative, instead be the one to take charge, make the first move, message them first, ask them out!
Myth: Men have to pay for the first date (in heterosexual relationships).
Fact: Again, this myth is another one created through stereotypical gender roles. When it comes to paying the rule, I tend to follow the rule that whoever organised the date would pay. Anyway, this is just a suggestion and however you like to split the check is totally fine! Just remember that in heterosexual relationships men don’t always have to pay.
Myth: Qualities that sightly irritate you can be overlooked.
Fact: Guilty. I think it’s really important not to settle or overlook flaws or non-negotiables just because you're tired of being single. It’s not worth getting into a relationship with someone who doesn’t tick all your boxes, or in fact, has flaws that are pretty irritating just because you're over being single. Stay strong and true to yourself because you deserve someone who ticks ALL the boxes!
By Alexis Pallister
